Goodbye 2010, Hello 2011.

2010, Has finally come to an end!

This makes me full of emotions, Because It's a whole new year a fresh new start. As being a mom, As being a wife, as being a family.


My view on 2010

-I fell Pregnant, Which was a thing that made me become very nervous and happy.
-I became a fiancee to a wonderful man who purposed to me on mother's day.
-I became a mother to a wonderful Daughter on December 15.

-I spent the whole year with a man that treats me amazing.

My sum up seems pretty small, But there were so many details involved in this sum up, That I will not add. They are just memories for me and my family to know. And Memories are special things, not always do they have to be written down or taken a picture or video of I've learned.

My hopes for 2011

To be the best mother and fiancee I can be, treat my family wonderful. Loose a good 30 pounds, hopefully that will work out, I want to re-enter myself in school after I am use to being a full time mother. I want to get a job, But that will probably have to wait for next year. I want to help my family out more often when they need me. A better additude when I look at life, and smile when things go wrong just so I can stay happy.

I want to look over life with a new view, this means a lot to me because if i'm not happy my daughter will not be happy. And I want everything for my daughter and my little family, I want to breast feed her for as long as I can.

This is a short sum up, for what I want for 2011, Because I can't always guess or even say what I want to do, because you don't know really until it happens.

Camilla is a healthy girl, she has her 2 week check up 2 days ago, she's healthy. 7 pounds 6.5 ounces, 20 inches long. Baby girl is growing which is good, makes me sad.. I feel like I just had her yesterday. These 2 weeks have been the fastest of my life. Everything is going by so quickly.

My own early Christmas Present

She's finally Arrived that little bundle of joy I've been waiting for for 9 months. It's hard to come down to what I've exactly wanted to say, But I'm going to tell you how my labor went and how I am feeling being into a whole new start and world into motherhood.

I went into early labor on the 13th at 9:13 p.m having contractions 5 minutes apart. Went to the hospital around 11:00 and they told me I was dilated to 2 1/2, they made me walk around for an hour straight without sitting down unless really needed. To try to make some progress but none was made when they checked me again. So they sent me home, I lost more of my mucus plug when I got home and my contractions did not stop that night, they were still 5 minutes apart. I only got about 3 hours of sleep that night everytime I went to sleep I woke up from another contraction happening. The next night late at night, I took a hot bath like the doctor told me, to help progress the labor it surely did because right after I got out of the bath tub around 5:00 my contractions were 3 minutes apart and 5 minutes apart and way more painful! I ended up going to the hospital once again around 7:30 and they checked to see if I've dilated anymore and sure enough I was dilated to 7 1/2! They sent me to a room right away, I started pushing around 3:00 A.M possibly around 2:30 if not that. I pushed for 2 1/2 hours and there wasn't much progress my bones didn't move much like they were suppose to be moving so I had to go into a C section, By the way I had an epidural and it was amazing, my body was numb and they gave me some pain meds. My blood pressure went up and down a bit though because of the meds they were giving me but it was good enough for me to go into a C section around 5:00 A.M. You want to know what a C section feels like for the people who don't know? It feels like a bunch of pressure, that's about it. Because I had so much pain meds and because I still had the Epidural I barely felt a thing, just pressure..

Camilla Renee Johngan was born at 5:45 A.M, weighed 7 pounds 6 ounces and was 19 inches long. I remember her scream when they took her out it was breath taking.. I cried when I heard her for the first time. Regi made an amazing coach during my labor, he was there to hold my hand and rub my back and head when I was in pain. He was there when I got the epidural and when I was getting my C section. Regi agree's with me on this one. How lovely it was to hear her cry for the first time. Camilla we had been waiting for you for 9 long months and now that you have arrived you are the best thing that's came into my life. How could I love something so much that is so small. I will always keep you safe, you will always be daddy's and mommy's little angel girl forever.  Your mommy and Daddy Camilla will always remember hearing your first cry.. and your first poop, which was very stinky from what I've heard since Daddy had to change it.

A message to my little Camilla Renee.
you will always be mommy and daddy's girl. You will never change our hearts we will always love you for who you are whatever you decide to do with your life. My expectations are for you just to be you, and fill your life with great things that I did not get to do as much as I wanted to. Your already amazing, and I already have a thought that you are going to make big things in the future happen with your life. Because from that first cry, I know you will be amazing. To mommy and Daddy at least, We love you.





When you smile it melts my heart. You will forever be mommy and daddy's christmas present for a lifetime.

37 weeks, 9 months.

Here's what has happened at my prenatal appointment, and what has been going on in the last few days.

-The Doctor checked If I was Dilated, I'm Dilated to 1 so far as we know. Which is great, could mean she will come soon.

-Baby is fully dropped from what the doctor has said, He said I should feel like I'm carrying a Bowling Ball inbetween my legs, Which I totally feel like I am.

-I'm starting my weekly Prenatal appointments my next appointment is on Friday.

-Late this morning, Last night. Around 12:00 I lost some of my mucus plug. Which means she'll be here even closer than we thought, my Due date is December 23,2010 for those of you who don't remember.

-Had some Contractions after loosing a bit of my mucus plug, and before I lost a bit of it.

The things to look forward to these days to come.

-Regi is getting his haircut Friday. Finally, Tired of him having an Afro ha ha.
-Regi is going Christmas shopping, Makes me want to find out what he's getting me!
-Going to birthing classes this weekend, knowing me I'll be super tired though because they're early in the morning and they go all day!


How I am Currently Feeling.

-In so much pain I can barely stand it, it really sucks.
-I feel anxious, and nervous. Because it's getting closer and closer to my due date and there are signs that labor should be coming early.
-I feel tired also, it's not easy holding up a small baby in your belly!

This is just an update for everyone, for what I'm looking forward to and Just to update everyone.
Enjoy.

Thanksgiving, 36 weeks, 9 months!

Thanksgiving is here!

It's about time, I love to eat my food. But My blog is not just about me, It's about my daughter and how my life is going. I'm thankful for certain things I'd like to point out since this is the day of "Thanks".

I'm thankful for having such a wonderful understanding mother, who was nearby my side where ever I stood Happy or sad. Or even just down a bad path.
I'm thankful for having such a wonderful man in my life, that has put me on the right track, I couldn't ask to have a baby with anybody else but him! I'm thankful for my grandmother, (and her cooking) She's one of the most amazing woman I have met in my life besides my mom. I'm thankful for my Aunt and Uncle, They are amazing people who always know how to put a smile or a laugh even on your down-est days. My grandpa, He's the father figure Who filled in the shoes when I didn't talk to my father as much. As of now I talk to my father, Still have yet to meet up with him to reunite with him. But I know in Time it'll come! I'm thankful for Rick my moms fling, Lover or whatever you will call them best friends. The hell if I know. He's an amazing guy who always know's how to make me laugh and has made bad situations always look good! I'm thankful for FINALLY having a baby cousin! My first ever cousin, Thank you Jami and Josh for having sex to put her in this world! (ha ha) There's been so much that's happened this year I couldn't ask for a better life or even to change a small part of it! I'm thankful for all the people who attended Camilla's baby shower and showed me how much people really do care in this weird world we live in. I'm thankful last but not least for having this wonderful daughter that still lives in my belly. Hopefully she will come out soon. I'm getting a bit tired of her living inside of me!


36 weeks, 9 months FINALLY.


Well Here it is, I'm finally at the marking point of 9 months. Camilla can come at anytime now from what I've read and heard. It's nice to turn something good on a great Holiday. Meaning turning 9 months and 36 weeks. I got my First contractions a few days ago, On early Wednesday morning I believe. Those Fuckers hurt!
She's been putting a lot of pressure down below and when she moves she jabs me more than she kicks me now. But her movements are healthy, I like to do that whole kick count thing the doctors say to do.  She likes to push her butt and whatever else she's been pushing at the upper top of me. It hurts but I deal with it of course I do.  I love you Camilla! Mommy and Daddy Can't wait to meet you whether it's soon or it's past the Due date (God hope not!)


Regi's birthday!
He's turning into such an old man I swear, His birthday was on Tuesday the 22nd, He turned 19 years old. Can't believe how fast this year went by. I feel like it was just yesterday we were actually celebrating his 18th Birthday! His birthday wish was for snow, and damn right he got that snow. I don't remember getting this much snow in a long time. He certainly enjoyed it, he stayed out for so long I thought he might get hypothermia or something worse! If there is something worse than that from staying out in the cold so long?
We didn't have much money (yet) To get him a birthday present so knowing me I just picked out a really funny card and the whole family signed it. Were taking him on Friday to go see the new Harry Potter movie!
Than we shall get him a birthday present!
I love you Regi, And as I've said I couldn't ask for a better man in my life.





P.S for the reader's I got a Prenatal appointment on the first. Wonder if he'll check if I'm dilated or not? Well see and I'll update everyone on that as quickly as I can.

35 weeks pregnant.

In that picture, I was 33 weeks pregnant as you can read. But today I am 35 weeks pregnant! 
5 more weeks to go if not less!
http://camillasdaddy.blogspot.com/


I can't wait to have my baby girl, I want her in my arms, I want her in Daddy's arms as well. I want her to look into the beautiful world with whatever colored eyes she has. Regi has started his own blog, It's posted above You can click it and read it as well. He's going to do a weekly blog to update everyone on how our baby girl is doing, and just our lives. Me and Regi have been waiting patiently for Camilla, It seems that each week that passes now is getting slower and slower. An update for everyone on my last prenatal appointment. Camilla is 5 to 5 1/2 pounds the doctor said as an estimate.  Camilla's heartbeat is also healthy which I'm glad.I'm not Dilated at all, Which is great. Apparently great There's a spot in my heart where I wish I was at least a little bit Dilated because I'd know she'd be coming soon. Now I pounder the thought. When will she be here?






I've got to cut things short on this blog. Sorry That everything has ended up being underlined Only because For some reason this blog, wont get off underline. Hope everyone is doing just as well as me and Regi are!


We love you baby Camilla, Can't wait to meet you, 5 weeks if not sooner! Your our sunshine. I think I found a great nickname for you. Pumpkin or Hunny bear. I'll decide once I see you I guess. 

32 weeks, 8 months.

I remember just being 5 weeks, seeing our first ultrasound of you. You were so tiny, now your a huge girl who kicks mommy so hard you can make a remote bounce off my belly. You seem to respond well to voices, and the dogs barking. Heard it's a good sign when the baby responds well to sounds outside of the womb.

Well we are now at 32 weeks, Not that many weeks to go! I had my baby shower October 23,2010. I wish You were already out of me just for 10 seconds to see how many people came to see you, and celebrate you. (See you in mommy's belly at least) We've got so much clothes and everything that we barely have room to fit anything in the drawers! Diapers, I could say we could keep packing them. We've got tons, 2 blue tub box's full of diapers, But I heard babies tend to pee and poop more than an average person (Of course).
Daddy decorated Cupcakes for your celebration of life, at the baby shower. He was sick as a dog. We wish he could of been upstairs more but baby showers are kind of a girl thing, You'll learn that when your older and have your own kid. I don't want to think about that yet though! Thanks to you Camilla Renee my belly button is almost out I haven't seen my belly button in years from all the weight I've gained. It's weird how when there's not a baby in there your belly button just decides to go deeper and deeper but when you gain weight from having a baby inside of you your belly button decides to come out and play peek-a-boo.  I looked at the baby shower as a way of people not coming just to see me but to celebrate you, and I love to know you will be a loved baby once your in this big world. I'll always support your decisions in the future believe that. I love feeling your kicks they get stronger every week I just finished reading up on how much bigger you will get week by week. A whole pound every week! GEEZ! You know that sort of scares me, I've already gained pretty big of weight, I've got a prenatal appointment on the First of November. Camilla, Want to know something spectacular Your daddy and I have been together for 1 year and 4 days. Today is October 28,2010 If you ever wonder when you read this in the future.  Another happy thing that I look forward to this coming up month Which is November Your Father's birthday. I wonder what kind of food he'll request this year, Last year he requested my grandmother to make Homemade lasagna. I smudged cake all over his face that birthday for him, It was funny He said it was the first time he'd ever gotten someone to put cake on his face! I don't really know what my second cousin will be to you, but she's having a baby girl as well. Her baby shower is in November, I'm so excited for that! She made you an awesome Diaper cake. Gotta love more diapers! It's so beautiful I wish I could make her one but it would turn out looking like the Eiffel tower. Yesterday I went shopping from some gift cards I got from family I finally got what I wanted to get you the hand print foot print ink set. It's so cute can't wait to see your tiny feet embedded on it. Also bought you some leggings! We'll as for now I'm done with this blog. I'll keep you all updated next week on the things that have happened. Thanks for reading.



We Love you  Camilla Renee Johngan.

30 weeks, 7 months.

Finally 30 weeks!


I've got some pro's and some con's to tell you about. The things that are running through my mind and the things that are making me happy or making me just down right sad.

But, I'll firstly give you an update on how my follow up with my doctor went after I went to the ER.
I have no fluid leak, Everything looked fine which is great! I'd hate for Camilla to come this early in my pregnancy anyways! He said her heartbeat is healthy and her movements are healthy as well. Which makes me extremely happy and I get a breath of relief.

The things that have made me sad recently is realizing that, My grandmother not the one I live with but the one that lives in Arizona named Grandma Ruthy has a  horrible thing called  Alzheimer's For the people who don't know Some people get it and it just leaves them to forget things it's the simplest I can put it. It's a pretty complex thing, I hate being away from her I haven't seen her in years, She's a happily married women to a man who has the same thing, But it saddens me to know that she wont ever know Camilla, She wont even remember that I'm pregnant for all I know, she still thinks I'm a little girl. That I'm not 16 anymore. I remember grandma Ruthy's visits, When she brought her husband it was around this time and Halloween. I walked with them to Kmart, Let me tell you it wasn't that far but these old people were fascinated by leaves, "Love among the Alamo" Is what her husband wanted to say and bring some leaves home with them and put it in a frame.  When we finally made it to Kmart, Like 2 hours later from walking, Which is normally just a 30-45 minute walk, She bought me fake nails for my Halloween. My first pair of fake nails, only to wear for one night of course. I remember saying how much I wanted my dog to have a dog bed, We ended up buying him one she insisted. But, I didn't really want my dog to have a dog bed, Secretly when she left I would cuddle with that pillow that was made for my dog because I already missed her once she left. I think that was the last time I'd ever seen her. I'm always gonna have great memories of her, We've had so many good times. She use to drive me and the family crazy when her and her husband ate Ice cream. They'd scoop the bowl until it was dry, with metal spoons of course it always made that clicking noise. But I don't think we ever said anything to them because they were just enjoying themselves. If there was something I could say to her, It would be that Camilla will know her even when she's gone, Or even when she's still in Arizona, I will show her pictures and tell her all the fun times me and my family had with her. Also how much I wish she was around for these moments.
Another plus that saddens me, My fiancées grandmother has the same thing. I haven't even met her, But Regi says she's gonna pass away soon I hope to god I can meet that amazing women I know she's amazing because she's made it this far into the world even with her Alzheimer's as well.  These two women are probably the strongest Besides my mother and my fiancées mother, there are so many strong women in this world. But these are the ones I want to acknowledge right now.
We love you, I love you Even though I may have not met you yet. But I will sooner or later hopefully.

And I love you Grandma Ruthy, You'll always be in my heart even though your far away. I can still Remember your touch and your laugh. (Arizona feels like it's across the world but it isn't)
Kind of think of it, Things that are away from me that I want to see so badly Like Regi's mom, feels like she's across the world, But maybe she is since she's in Georgia, and I'm in Washington. haha.


To leave on a happy note, I have no gestational Diabetes! Go me! ( : 

The Hospital Visit, An update for everyone.

October 8th, 2010 Friday, 
I had to go to the ER (Emergency Room for people who don't know what an ER is)

The reason I had to go to the ER were for the following
-My daughter had not kicked me all day, Not even 10 times.
-I was having a fluid leak, I did not know what the fluid was or where it was coming from.
-I was having Severe Cramping in my lower belly.

Most of the time a woman is happy when they have to go to the hospital, It means they're baby is ready to come, As for me there were a million thoughts running through my mind of being scared. Not because I was having her already or something but because she had not kicked. I'm now 7 months pregnant, 29 weeks.
When I first entered the ER, I told them what was wrong and how I was feeling, they had to send me to the birthing center ER, for a OB/GYN to check me, First off let me tell you my experience at the hospital while I was there. It was horrible, I had a nurse who was a sarcastic little bitch. It made me realize I hope I'm not that rude while I'm sarcastic like I'm known to be. But the good thing is once the nurse put the heart beat Doppler I guess you could call it on my belly, Camilla started kicking away. I can tell she's gonna be just as feisty as me, That makes me a bit worried, but hearing her heartbeat made me have a satisfying breath of security.
So there was the checklist of things being okay.

-Camilla's Healthy Heartbeat
-Camilla's Kicking.

For the next step, I wanted to know about the leaking fluid and my horrible cramping.
I got a sort of fever on my lower belly when I was cramping as well.
The doctor came in, She had to check my insides, if you know how that goes with the metal bar, EXTREMELY PAINFUL! She took a few tests on what the leaking fluid could be, She said one of the tests came out positive for a fluid leak on the sack, but another one came out negative. So it's still an iffy thing. Overall They gave me a referral to go back to see my doctor sometime this week. Hopefully can squeeze me in, but since it's a hospitals referral I think I'll get in my doctors office just fine. I didn't exactly like the doctor as much as I liked the nurse too The doctor didn't even bother to come in and tell me my test results, The nurse had to tell me, and she didn't seem she knew so much what she was talking about as well!
They gave me medication for a bladder infection, even though they tested me for that and it came out negative and I'm having no signs of a bladder infection. We'll so I'm not left with much answers yet, only thoughts of maybe having horrible Braxton Hicks already.

I'll give you all an update when I have my actual doctor appointment. Wish me luck, Hope there's no Fluid Leak or anything wrong with our precious baby girl Camilla!

29 weeks, 7 months.

I haven't updated my blog for a while now because things have been so busy.
I'll tell you the upside of things that have happened recently to let you know an update on my current life waiting for Camilla Renee to be born.
-Had a Prenatal appointment on October 5th, 2010. The heartbeat is healthy, we even got a mini ultrasound. Too bad she wasn't facing the right way so we could of seen her face. But that's okay, In time we will see her face in real life.
-Had a WIC appointment on the 6th, It went pretty smooth we met up with one of the WIC ladies.
She gave me and Regi some fun couple stuff to do, and I got my WIC checks which is great. I'm dieing for Skippy Peanut Butter.
-Had an appointment with my WIC nurse, Who taught me the upsides of breast feeding, and the downsides. Also the upsides of formula feeding, and the downsides too it as well. She also showed us the fetal development, She showed Regi and I a model of how much the baby weighs at 30 weeks, that we actually got to hold. She called them gummy babies, they were so weird looking. But she brought out the other models to show us how much bigger our baby has gotten since it was 5 weeks!
-We bought the Travel System finally. For those of you who don't know what a travel system is it is a Carseat, Stroller combo. It is so cute it has apples on it, Very girly, But girly is good! Can't wait for her to be inside of it once I give birth to her.
-Got Braxton Hicks for the first time today. Man They are painful, But it's all worth it in the end. Most people would worry about it being so early for me getting Braxton Hicks, but it runs in my family to get them early on in the pregnancy.

The things I miss Now since I am 29 weeks pregnant.
-My feet. I can't tie my shoes or put my shoes on very well without getting out of breath.
-Going on dates with Regi, I miss those really bad. We haven't been on much dates recently because of all the baby preparing. But I guess the newest dates you could call us having are driving to the store to go grocery shopping, and shopping for the baby.
-The normal walk, I have that pregnancy waddle now. I feel ridiculous walking around with a waddle. Makes me feel fat.
-Normal not leaking boobs! Colostrum has finally set into my boobs, and let me tell you it's not fun. My boobs itch now and also I can't even think about sleeping without a bra off in the night. It really sucks!


A note to Camilla Renee 

Camilla your little precious kicks are getting harder, I know I've said this plenty of times in my blog But your a strong little girl for something so small. You can kick daddy in the head when he tries to feel you kick, and he tries to listen to you. You can kick remotes off of me now. I feel like your an alien inside of me but don't worry your mommy and daddy's little alien. People always ask me Camilla, What are you going to be a daddy's girl or a mommy's girl. I can't answer that really because it's your choice, to my hopes you'll enjoy me and daddy equally.  Sometimes I wish you could stop kicking me at night, I love your kicks don't get me wrong But I love sleep too! We have everything ready for you, Tons of clothes, Receiving blankets, Some blankets, And even a blanket your Great Grammy made for you! It's so beautiful I hope you'll love it just as much as I do. It's purple because I don't want everything to be too pink for you. We have your crib set up, the bumper and everything, stuffed animals, A swing set, bottles, Diapers. And much more. Your very loved and Everyone cannot wait to meet you.

Love,
Your Mommy.






-P.S for the readers, I will be posting a picture for this blog when I update it on my other computer.
Enjoy!
( :

26 weeks, 6 and 1/2 months.

Last week we got to listen to our precious baby girls heartbeat, Which is greatly healthy. She kicked the doctor when he was trying to listen to her heartbeat.


Okay, So now I thought about it, The hard question of what am I craving, I do believe it is cheese, and chocolate. I love cheese, I just can't stop eating it for some reason, Every time we have pizza it HAS TO HAVE extra cheese! Not something I normally ask for on a pizza, normally it's more pepperoni please. (haha)
We'll In the last week or so, Camilla has found a game to play with mommy already. She'll kick me, until I put a good not to hard pressure on my belly to feel around for her, and when I find her she kicks and moves away, once I stop playing this "game" She will kick the crap out of me until I play with her some more.
Restless nights, I've been having From her now, My thighs have been hurting and so have my hips, due to expansion. I've come to realize that I love my belly bump and all but it's causing some great deal pain on my back. Some people think I look like I am already due. Which is crazy, Since I'm only 26 weeks!
The crib is here, Which makes me really happy one step closer for Camilla to be here in the arms of mine and her daddy's.
I'll do some more blogging later
<3

24 weeks, 5 months.

Fresh into the new world. Is kind of how I'm opening my eyes to. Thinking of how everything is new for a baby and everything amazes them when they see something for the first time. I still wish my life was like that, Thinking back My favorite moment when I babysat my little brother was when he started crawling, his smile was so cute. And not to forget so warming. But to think I'm going to have a baby, That will soon learn to Smile, laugh, cry, crawl, and walk. Is just pure amazement. That me and my boyfriend made this baby something that is new to the world and came from my belly! Have you ever pictured yourself with a child, If I could answer that honestly, I'd say Sure, in the future. But not this early. The only thing I was use to calling my baby was my dogs Haha, But now baby has a totally new meaning. Camilla Renee, I hope you get my eye color and your daddy's skin tone. That would be pure amazement too. But i'll love you just the way you are
when you come out of mommy's tummy. School is right around the corner, and soon the baby shower is as well. October 23,2010 Close to mommy's favorite holiday Halloween! And besides Halloween very close to when Me and Regi first met. This year, Has gone by so fast I feel like everything has changed so quickly. I went from meeting Regi- Spending Halloween with Regi- Spending time with Regi on his birthday- And even so thanksgiving and Christmas And sometime through that whole moment of that a few odd months later, soon after mommy's birthday.  I figured out i was pregnant. Did I forget to mention, Regi is buying the crib Tomorrow (Friday) And more things. I can't wait for the crib, because that's when things really sink in! I can't wait to get a crib to picture the size of how small she will be! A mother, Sort of hard to imagine At first being pregnant and finally figuring it out, I was like "ME A MOTHER!?!"
But now.. . It's simple to say, I wonder how much lack of sleep I'll get when she's here, Or how much she'll eat, If she's gets a cold will I know what to do? Thousands of questions will always run through my mind even though the thought of pregnancy has finally settled in. But I heard that's normal for most new moms especially at such a young age.
Hope you stay tuned with my blogging.
<3


"A Daughter Is... ...your greatest source of pride and your greatest hope for the future... The happiest moment of your life was the day she was introduced to the world."
-- Bettie Meschler

22 weeks, 5 months

Camilla,
I haven't even met you yet and I love you already so much. You know when they say
a mothers love for their child is the biggest love. I think I'm starting to understand that.
When I figured out the sex of you, you wouldn't cooperate with the doctor
we only had 5 minutes left for our appointment. My mom tickled me and made me laugh
You know what's cute? When I laugh, you move and kick, It warms my heart.
I drank a nice gulp of water, we tried once more to see the sex, than you finally showed us
I sat up with joy when they said you were a little girl.
You'll wonder one day how mommy and daddy met. I'm willing to share that story with not only
you, but my friends.


The moment I saw Regi's pictures I knew he was special in some sort of way.
Back than I was in a depression, but somehow your daddy Camilla, seemed to cheer me up.
He made me feel like there was something that could help me. He was there for me.
At that time, we both had x's, that were crazy and we were so attached in a bad relationship
But we still found the time to talk to each other. Giving our old lovers excuses of why we had to use the computer and turn our backs on them. I remember the first time I saw Regi on webcam. I was sort of speechless, Shy like I am normally. There's a point I forgot to mention. I lived in Kent, Washington.
Regi had lived in Hull, Georgia. If you don't know that's a major difference
But somehow we made it through the rough times and were still talking to each other. There were moments where we just wanted to hate each other. But we always found a road back to each other.
One day, I got the courage to ask my family to buy him a bus ticket to come to Seattle, Washington where I would meet him and he would stay in my home. My family said yes right away. I was pretty surprised
We met around October near Halloween. We celebrated it Once we saw each other for the first time
we knew we'd be inseparable. And that's the truth he's only been home once, but we couldn't stand to be away from each other. Good thing he came back in time. Because a few weeks later I found out I was pregnant.


Some people will do anything for their kids, or children. You know what, I plan on being one of those parents. I met a women who searched frantically for her son's cat that was a birthday present.
That made me notice a lesson The things you would do for your kids. The things you can do to make them smile, make their day. I want to make my child's day every day
My ideal future for you, Camilla is for us to live together meaning Me (mommy) Regi (daddy)
And of course you. And maybe a few animals if I can talk daddy into it haha.
A thing I've noticed by now is life as we know it is coming to a change we are bringing a sweet baby girl into this new world. It'll be new to her, and it'll be a new start for us. But new starts are great from what I hear especially when bringing a baby into the world. I can't wait to  meet you December 23,2010
Please don't let my water break when i'm taking a bit of turkey or ham.
That would suck.

Love,
Kelsey.

P.S  Camilla, stop kicking me when mommy is about to sleep.
It makes me stay awake.

21 Weeks, 5 months

It's amazing to notice how time flies by so fast during a pregnancy.
Feeling her small little kicks is just the start to this long journey.
I know I'll have this baby for a lifetime.  That makes me smile.
She won't always be a baby though. But, she'll always be my little girl.
It's a note from me to her, to tell her I will always love her just the way she is.
Whatever she decides on doing during her life, I'll always be there for her.
Mommy and daddy weren't expecting you at this very moment Camilla.
I'm not going to lie, it's a little early to meet you, even when you're still inside my belly
like this. But, god has given me a reason to be good, to do things different with my life
and to have the privilege to have you in my life.  You're going to be mommy and daddy's little girl.
Our little baby girl. I plan on raising you right and to let you know how to have manner's.
I will help you pick the right path instead of the ones mommy and daddy once took.
You've changed our way of thinking, Camilla Renee Johngan.
And we have you to thank when you're out of me.

Well this was just a special note for my daughter.  One day when she's old enough to read.  I can't believe I'm 21 weeks pregnant.  I feel like it was just yesterday that I found out I was pregnant!
Well for some of you who don't know the story yet, it goes like this:

When I figured out I was pregnant, it took me a while to accept that it was true.  I took 7 Clearblue pregnancy tests, (do you realize how much money those friggin things cost!). Regi, my fiancée almost had a heart attack on the floor.  We are so young.  It was kind of like a being hit in the face with a block of wood without seeing it coming. And, when I say heart attack, I don't mean it literally. We went to the doctors office, and they said I was defiantly pregnant, from the pee sample.  I started getting flutters in my stomach, still in denial, without an ultrasound or hearing the heartbeat.  We had to wait 1-2 long weeks before we could get a doctor appointment. I was for sure thinking this is it i am really pregnant. The doctor showed me the baby. My mother was in the room at that time and she was crying, which made me nervous, and Regi was about to cry as well.
We heard the heartbeat and that's when it sunk in. Everything seemed to go by so slow back then. I couldn't believe I was pregnant and this was going to happen.  Abortion never crossed my mind.

If I am going to have a baby at least I'm having it with the one I love.


Camilla, When I first felt you kick it was amazing. You kicked my moms head, that was pretty funny, and you kicked my grandmothers hand. And Regi's hand and head too. You kick me when I'm laying down and about to go to bed. By the way, you give me horrible pains, but it does not bother me one bit, it's all worth it.

For now, this is my first blog. I'm a bit truthful, if you can't tell. So enjoy.
<3